I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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