Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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