I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
