Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
