Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
