I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
