I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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