and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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