thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
