Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize