i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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