Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize