Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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