This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
