we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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