I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
