So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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