they need to just BURY HIM!
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
oh god was she eating orange peels again
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
