My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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