I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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