Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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