the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Randomize
