Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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