Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize