I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
