wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
