Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
