After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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