He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
this boner is exhausting
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize