Your mouth is God's brothel.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
