So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
