Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
