My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
