Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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