Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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