Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Success! We fucked roommates!
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize