I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
