I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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