Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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