You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
