I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
is it fun? or sober?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
