We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I am one with the molecules
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
