Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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