Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize