thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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