maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
