The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize