You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
whose parrot is this?
I have feelings that need drinking.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
