I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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