I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
