I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
