Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Just high enough for therapy.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
